Managing Anger

Like anxiety, anger has many forms.  It can be seen in self-destructiveness, self-hatred, rage, cruelty and spite.  However, unlike anxiety, anger is viewed negatively as it can poison everyday life, impact on social interactions and is not often considered as part of mental health unless it is obviously labelled as ‘Anger Management Issues’. 

However, it can be seen in mental health issues such as self-harm, alcoholism, obsessive and paranoid disorders, but it can also exacerbate physical issues such as hypertension, skin disorders, heart disease and of course gastric issues like IBS.  Because of the way it manifests it is not seen in a very sympathetic light, but at its root is fear, the desire to control and prevent something bad from happening.  Many factors can feed into anger, including personal isolation, the inability to deal with emotions, lack of sleep, poverty, poor nutrition and hormones.

Techniques for dealing with anger…

The angry letter

Write a letter to the person concerned. Tell this person exactly what you think of him or her and let the anger flood out. When you’ve expressed your anger and calmed down, put it in the bin. DO NOT BE TEMPTED TO POST THIS LETTER.

Physical release

If you feel the need to express your anger, then beat a cushion or your bed, repeatedly saying “I’m angry, I’m angry”. This is likely to produce the results you want.

Express your anger

Go somewhere quiet and shout out your anger. If you jog or walk, shout out, “I hate you” or whatever you are feeling, in time to each step. Feel your anger. Express it!

Forgiveness

Hating people eats away at us and hurts us rather than the other person. By releasing your anger in private you may find you feel able to understand and forgive the other person.

Feel the fear

When you get angry, you may well be very frightened. Try to see behind your anger and do something about the fear.

Deal with your anger in private. The intention is to release your anger, not to hurt others.

Now read. It’s not always what you eat it’s the way you eat it

If you feel that you might be struggling to manage your anger, then you can get help through talking therapies such as counselling, CBT or anger management.  You don’t need to struggle with it on your own.

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